Coffee shops with Community guitars should be outlawed.

So I'm in Arkansas and if you have read my blog in the past you are already aware of my feelings towards this state. Over all I find it to be comparable to that weird uncle no one wants in the family, but in a surprising turn of events I have found that the little rock area is quite nice, and beyond that the people are great… which brings me two questions: a) how can these people stand the rest of their state, and b) how could such good people be responsible for Bill Clinton?.... and where did Clinton's accent come from?! None of these people sound like him.
Today I attended my friend's church and the whole staff was great. The only older member of the staff is the senior pastor who earlier today gave a very informative message on how women should have "relations" with their husbands… and often. I honestly cried because I laughed so hard at some of the anecdotal references this man made. There are few things in this world as amusing as seeing a small southern man talk about sex in the same sentence as mowing the lawn and other yard work related activities. For a second I began to think that this state might not be so bad and I briefly forgot that I was in the backwards dirty south; but that moment quickly ended when I walked into a coffee shop after church and ordered a Venti Vanilla Chai tea only to be asked by BOTH employees of this fine establishment, "umm… which size is Venti?" followed by, "ya, what's vIIINNTaaa?"
More to come later, but as for now I must sleep.