Getting my history on

Yesterday I went to the D-Day memorial in Bedford, VA. It was amazing. Since this is a holiday weekend and all, you should take some time and learn about your history. This picture shows a section of the list of fallen soldiers who died on D-Day.

You can check out other pictures on my facebook page.

Pictures are worth a thousand words.

I found this post on on of the funniest blogs I have ever read. I thought you might enjoy it.

I fraking hate tomatoes.

So I spent some time today in a sporting good shop. (exercise, not guns) I've been on this "Get less fat" kick so i thought it would be a good place to hang out. I didn't get anything to further my cause, (although as of this morning I had lost 20 lbs) but I did see a family of 5 extremely obese people walking out of the store. I didn't think anything of it at the time, but as i drove away i was left with one question: "What exactly were they doing there?" I mean they didn't buy anything, and I'm fairly certain the last family meeting did not include any sort of a plan which involved an ab roller, or a set of those power push-up things. I realize this sounds like profiling, and perhaps it is, but I mean no disrespect - I am a recovering fat kid myself. I am just very confused.

Also, I have added to new players to the list of movie characters I have been compared to. I have to admit, this list is getting extensive and none of them make me happy. The new ones are: The pirate from "the count of Monte Cristo" (based on the fact that he is funny, and is the whipping boy of the count... I'm going to over look any fat joke which may or may not be associated with this image), and Bob the Tomato from veggie tales... keep the jokes to yourself.

Another blog about poop

Normally my blog isn't so crass, but this has been a crazy week. The cleanse was aweful. It made me want to die. Shooting pains, fetal position on the floor... no good.

Things have been fine since that stopped. Well until today when I got back from lunch with a friend to find that my apartment had flooded. That was annoying in and of itself, but comical. I have been the plumbing guy before, and I know that these things happen so I just laughed about it. Then Rich (our local handy man) and I found out that it was sewage backing up on the floor. The laughing stopped.

** THIS NEXT PART IS GROSS. Parental discretion is advised. ** Once we realized what was going on, we shut everything down, and stopped it from coming in anymore... then there was something odd... yet familiar, floating in the water. It was toilet paper. It was used. It was not mine. Gross.

The cleaning people are here right now chemically treating the carpet, steaming it, and then doing it again. I asked steve, the cleaning guy, if he could just set the carpet on fire instead, but apparently the fire marshal frowns on such things.

I still feel dirty.

Cleansing

I would like to think that I make more good decisions than bad ones. On an average day that's probably true. There are those days, however, that you make a decision that clearly nullifies every good choice you have ever made... today I started the "Master cleanse." This was a crowning achievement of asinine selections. Allow me to explain:

I willingly chose to - 1. Drink Sea Salt water... this will rekindle your friendship with porcelain. 2. I am forgoing food in place of a liquid diet which consists of - 3. A concoction of organic maple syrup, lemon juice, water, and cayenne pepper, which I have agreed to drink 5-6 times a day. Those of us doing this cleanse together have named it "The Mexican Death." This makes you feel like your insides have been freed of toxin, but have taken the opportunity to throw an all night kegger while the former chemically engineered tenants of your blood stream are on hiatus. Although this is not painful, it is less than comfortable, and has left me wondering if health nuts are nothing more than herbal masochists.

I'm going to stick with this for a day or so more in the hopes that the good out ways the bad, but I feel it is an ambition which shares probability of success with this overweight white kid mastering the terpsichorean arts.